Random Thoughts

We all have events that change our lives, events that are earthshattering enough that they change how our internal calendars work.   You know, the events that are etched in our minds and we count years as “pre-the event” and “post-the event”.   The first major one in my internal calendar is the day my mom died.   Mary Day. October 20, 2002. 20 years ago today.   We got the news that she was dying on another day that changed my internal calendar, and the internal calendars of most Americans old enough to have been alive then – September 11, 2001. So, one year, one month, and a few days after that dreadful diagnosis, she was gone. Some days it is hard to imagine that it has been 20 years without her.   And other days it feels like an eternity since she was here. So much has happened since she died – family weddings, births, illnesses, divorces, a global pandemic, family members purchasing new homes, and deaths.   Deaths of her daughter (my sister) and her husban

I don’t think of myself as “old”. But what IS old?   I mean, when does old start?   Does it creep up slowly?   Is it an overnight thing – where you go to bed one night middle aged and wake up the next morning old?   I don’t believe that old is tied to a number, an age.   I have known people who were in their 30s that felt “old”.   I had a beautiful interaction this weekend that made me realize, in the eyes of the world around me, I am indeed “old”, no matter how I feel or look in my own eyes when I look in the mirror.   And while at first that was a bit jarring to me, as I pondered it I thought back to all of the “old” women in my life, and I smiled.   I have become Mrs. Binder. Mr. and Mrs. Binder were our next-door neighbors growing up in Omaha, Nebraska.   I lived in the same house from the time I was born until I left for college, and Mr. and Mrs. Binder were a constant.   When I look back now, I realize that we didn’t have much interaction with them really, but f