I think we all do it, really, in some form or the
other. We search for perfection. Some people dream of a perfect BODY – curves in
all the right places and nary a wrinkle.
Some people hunt for the perfect mate – someone who fits every idealized
fantasy they can imagine.
Me – sometimes I catch myself running after the perfect
EXPERIENCE…
I did it tonight, and when I realized what was happening,
I had to laugh.
Here’s the deal – perfection doesn’t EXIST. There is no perfect body, no perfect mate, no
perfect family, no perfect house, or perfect life. And there is no perfect experience.
Have you ever tried to do that – ensure that you will
have the perfect experience?? If you can look at it from the outside, from
a bird’s eye view, you will see how utterly ridiculous it is. How about this one: trying to make the PERFECT HOLIDAY!! You buy the biggest, fullest Christmas
tree. You decorate it with gorgeous
ornaments. You bake the fanciest of
cookies. You buy the very best gifts and wrap them with the most beautiful
paper. But it will not be PERFECT. Someone will
end up with the flu and have to stay in bed instead of opening presents. The sweater you give to your uncle will be
the wrong size. One of your guests will
be allergic to nuts and unable to eat what you prepared. IT WON’T
BE PERFECT, trust me! I think that
is one reason people get so stressed around the holidays – they want, no, they EXPECT everything to be perfect, and it
never is!
Here is what happened one year when my partner David and I
tried to give his mother the PERFECT Christmas, the Christmas we knew would be
her last one on earth:
Instead of the artificial
Christmas tree his parents owned and always used, we went and got a “perfect”
one. A live one, so that the house would
smell of pine. We set it up in the
living room as his parents watched, wondering why we had wasted money on a tree
when there was a good plastic one in the basement. When it was decorated, David and I stepped
back and marveled at the beauty. Then we
all went to bed and in the middle of the night heard a very loud CRASH as the
tree, which had been so large we had to TIE IT with string to a curtain rod to
hold it up (cuz bigger is better, more PERFECT, right???) CRASHED TO THE
FLOOR. The water from the tree stand
leaked all over the hardwood floor and even stained it a bit.
Not to be derailed in our goal
of a perfect last Christmas, we got a bunch of little brown paper bags and secretly
made luminaries by cutting pretty shapes into the bags, putting in a bit of
sand for weight, and putting tea light candles in each one. When the coast was clear, we snuck into the
front yard, put all the luminaries out, lit each candle so they would glow, rang
the doorbell, then quickly hid from view!!!
As David’s mom opened the door, we quietly sang a lovely Christmas
carol. WHAT AN EXPERIENCE, RIGHT??? The snow, the luminaries glowing, our melodic
(if slightly out of tune) voices serenading her… Ahhhhh…
Her response?? “E-gads! It is freezing out there! Come inside, you are gonna catch cold!”.
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| A blurry (far less than perfect) photo of our failed attempt at the perfect last Christmas |
Perfect, right?
Another time I remember that we (I guess it is “I”
really, and David is willing to race alongside me) believed that if we tried
hard enough, we would have the PERFECT EXPERIENCE was a sunset in Key
West, Florida. Everyone in Key West told
us that a person “needed” to see sunset at Mallory Square. I mean, Mallory Square was the place
to watch the sunset. From the sound of
things, if you didn’t witness the sun set from Mallory Square, why, you were
nothing and had wasted every penny you spent coming to the southernmost point
of the United States!!! So, “sunset at
Mallory Square” went on my to do list, of course!!! We had a busy day of fun, but in the back of
my mind I kept thinking about the end goal, the perfect sunset, and watching
the clock. So, when it was almost time,
we drove to the much hyped location.
Only, everyone ELSE had gotten the memo, too, so parking
was nowhere to be found… We drove around
and around and finally settled on a spot that was quite far away. And you know what that means – A FOOT RACE TO GET TO SUNSET PERFECTION!!!!! We took off (well, I took off, and David
followed…). I was not going to miss that
sunset, damn it!!! We raced down cute
little streets, past adorable ice cream shops, with one goal in mind – P-E-R-F-E-C-T S-U-N-S-E-T.
Of course, as we raced, the sun was doing its own racing…
So, by the time we got to Mallory Square, there was only
a tiny bit of sunset left.
A tiny bit of SUNSET, but a LARGE MASS OF HUMANITY! Everyone and their brother was there, making
it impossible to see the sunset!!!
FOILED!
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| This is David. At the legendary PERFECT SUNSET in Key West. With every other tourist in the world. |
Lucky for us, in situations like that we often see the humor
instead of the sadness. I mean,
seriously, how many gorgeous sunsets have we seen in our lives already, what
the hell made us think this one was going to be even more perfect than the
others we had witnessed???
 |
| Sunset in Washington DC when the Washington Monument was covered in scaffolding - pretty! |
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| Sunset in San Diego at Balboa Park - gorgeous! |
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| Sunset in Tel Aviv - amazing!!! |
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| Sunset at the Air Force Monument in DC - stunning |
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| Sunset in KEY WEST, on the same vacation as the huge sunset failure described above: beautiful, but NOT in the PERFECT location of Mallory Park. :) |
And, like in Key West, as I walked, the sun was setting, and
the pink and orange colors were fading.
There wouldn’t BE an unobstructed, perfect view. Because this is REAL LIFE, and real life is
not perfect.
So, I stopped in the middle of the street. I laughed out loud at this insane search for
perfection. And I put my dumb hand in
the air and took a picture.
 |
| There. Photo for the day completed. MY H AND. |
I guess my point is – don’t waste your time trying to
make things perfect. In the end, the
time will have been wasted and perfection will not have been found anyway. ENJOY the pink clouds while they are there,
because soon enough, the sun will set.
(Link to the story and video of my first "Photo Everyday Project" - Bed a Day
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