The days are getting shorter. The sun, that brilliant star that lights our lives, is setting earlier. Bit by bit, every evening. This time of year is always a bit sad for me. It is a form of closure. Saying “goodbye” to another summer. Somehow, it is hard for me to couch it as saying “hello” to another winter. In my mind I know that is logical, but in my heart, another summer has passed to mourn. I haven’t felt my best the last couple of days. I put it down to stress – the big annual fundraiser I host is quickly approaching, and at the same time my job, my main source of income, is being threatened to disappear (health insurance along with it). So yeah, stress could make my body not function properly, right? Only, as the second day of feeling “off” wore on, it became harder and harder to ignore that things just weren’t right. It came to a head on a 25-minute car ride. We had met a friend for din...
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I am not one for New Year’s Resolutions. As a non-believer of them looking in, they appear to be recipes for feeling bad about yourself. · “Lose 20 pounds” – didn’t everyone make that resolution last year, and the year before, and the year before… · “Get my life in order” – if THIS isn’t a promise to yourself that is impossible to keep, I don’t know what is. (How about, instead, “Find a way to comes to terms at least a little bit about the chaos that is my life”) · “Start a new job/new school/new career/new relationship/new beginning” – not everything is in your control. Setting a mile high lofty resolution that will likely be impossible for you and you alone to fulfill (without the forces of nature and chemistry and finances and and and… that it takes to make major changes) – well, that might be bei...
And then sometimes, the magical veneer gets scratched a little bit… Look, I KNOW that life isn’t supposed to happen the way it does at our house. Like, I realize it is some kind of magical fluke that the kind of thing that happened yesterday doesn’t happen all the time. The fact that our house is located on a super busy corner with tons of car and foot traffic 24 hours a day and that we can keep ANYTHING safe that is visible on our front porch is technically something that should not be possible. It should all get taken, right? Even the actual TREE – bright, lovely, lights shining 24 hours a day – how does the TREE itself not get stolen? And hey, I get it. There is also a fine line here at the Big Yellow House. So much is given away here – food, warm clothing, umbrellas in the rain, other items if come ask for something and we happen to have it. So if, hypothetically, you “take something” from our home without asking, is it...
This is the story of my friend, Heather. It is also the story of my NOT friend, Jason. If you are offended by the use of foul language, specially the f-bomb, this is not the story for you and you should stop reading now. OK, it is just us foul mouth f-bomb droppers left, right? FUUUUUCK!! My friend Heather, a true sweetheart, messaged me this morning saying she had a massage appointment with “her guy” at “her place”. And OFFERING me said appointment. Like, free. As a gift. “All you would need to do is tip!” she proclaimed. Only, she sent the offer in the morning. And, having just gone through a particularly stressful and busy holiday season, I slept until around 12:30 pm. When I finally opened my phone to see what had happened in the world while I drooled on my pillow, the group conversation where the massage had been offered was full of, “SUSAN BETTER WAKE UP SOON! She is gonna miss ou...
Here’s the thing about privilege – it can be used in a positive way. Privilege has always been around. Some people have forever had privilege. We didn’t have a name for it when I was growing up, but it was there. Those of us who had our own bedrooms as a kid – privilege. Families who got to go out to eat at restaurants instead of eating tv dinners night after night – privilege. Students who had their choice of university regardless of the cost – privilege. And I think I have understood the concept of it for quite a while, before I had a label for it, but called it “ luck ”. Like, “We are so lucky that we get to travel a lot”. Or “It sure is lucky we have a hybrid car because gas is so expensive!”. But now I understand that those things often don’t happen because of luck. They happen because of privilege – something I have through no work of my own, but society has “gifted” me. So, whenever I can, I try to use my pri...